Here we go again... - In the name of Thiago - Day 33

Here we go again..

We have been celebrating Time to Talk day at work today, a day in which inadvertently I have become a champion for.

With all the shit that I’ve been through this last couple of months or so, the importance of how we look after each other’s mental health in the workplace has come into full focus for me, so there I stood trying to convert a few cynics into joining the bandwagon.

You get an interesting range of reactions from people when the subject of mental health rears its head in the workplace. You get people who are happy to discuss their circumstances, sometimes to the point of where other people less comfortable start to go into their shells.

Others just want the day to end dreading to be asked to do anything, or worse still contribute in some way to a discussion. I did mention to one person why mental health was important to me and then immediately felt bad for doing so. We seemed to be getting on quite well to that point as indeed we did afterwards, but I don’t like making people feeling uncomfortable as perhaps I could have just said nothing. Anyway, no real harm done.

Besides, this was just the prelude to the real fun for the day. While I’ve been telling people that it was ‘time to talk’ to encourage positive mental health, my poor wife Angelica has had her own mental state take a bit of a battering. She had to run my Dad up to a local NHS walk-in centre today, from where he was referred to our local hospital.

I’m not about to knock our magnificent NHS but these things do unfortunately take time as indeed they should do, and so another day of Angelica’s life is lost looking after my Dad. It is definitely taking its toll on all of us, as looking after the big man really does seem to be all we do, apart from eating and sleeping (and in my case blogging), with Angelica taking on so much of the responsibility.

I’m writing this from a hospital bedside at University Stoke Hospital with Dad now. We are no nearer to finding out what is causing him so much gastric pain but by pure chance thanks to a CT scan, we may have stumbled on a possible cancer completely unrelated to his current complaint, for which he is now being referred to an oncologist.

It is impossible to say any more about that yet but I am grateful that this accidental discovery has been made, as who knows otherwise how long it may have been before it was found.

You do always get lighter moments in hospitals, thank fuck as I’ve experienced the very darkest moments of my life in the bloody places too. A doctor said to a very elderly patient on the unit where I’m sat tonight: ‘Mr X do you know where you are? The patient replied, “Well you should know mate, you work here!”

My Dad may be moving to a ward tonight but he also has the option of coming home with me later after he’s had some more bloods taken. The consultant says it is his choice, I’ve told Dad it is his choice and yet he is just waiting for me to decide what to do. It really is exhausting and the worst part is, that in all probability it is only going to get worse. Good night everyone. I need to find coffee as I could be here a while…


  1. I know they say into each life a little rain must fall but frigging hell you have caught a monsoon. Keep on keeping on , lots of love out here for you all.

    1. Cheers Paul, it's incredible how quickly these things move. Every day is a new adventure. Sure a lot of it's shit but I'm learning a lot about myself too!


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