Sometimes it all just clicks - In the name of Thiago - Day 148

Well stone the crows if the old man and I haven’t just gone and got on like a bloody house on fire today. It’s fair to say that these last few days have been a test of endurance – essentially how much of him can I take before I lose my shit. Well the bond strengthened today and with him going off on his travels tomorrow – admittedly still with Angelica – to buy more furniture, he is getting close to achieving independence. And with his independence of course, comes the return of my sanity.

One person who has never remotely come close to getting frustrated with living with the old man is Elisa. Dad seems fascinated by Elisa’s ability to hold court at the dinner table and while she appreciates that he understands virtually nothing at all about the world she inhabits, she finds the fact that he exists at all, quite fascinating.

Dad, Elisa and Angelica are due to visit IKEA tomorrow to complete the purchase of the remaining furniture he needs for his bungalow. It might be that this doesn’t happen if Dad maybe starts to stress or has a bad experience at the local medical practice tomorrow, as often one small thing can send him spiralling. All being well though, he will be heading down the M6 in pursuit of all the joy that Swedish furnishings can provide.

This father son bonding development didn’t happen by accident. I worked quite hard at it and am proud of myself for helping to make the magic happen. It started with sitting down in the lounge and going through what Dad needed for his place.

We agreed that he would be in charge of a pen and paper and that I would search for all the products online so that he had a starting point when he gets to IKEA tomorrow. Yes, that sounds easy, but there were so many points in this journey where things could have easily taken a turn down shit street. I made it clear that he was in control and he remained calm.

And when that was all done, which took about an hour, we went outside with the chainsaw and started working in the garden. While I have never probably explicitly said it in as many words here, you have probably got the correct impression that I am something of a numpty when it comes to anything remotely practical. It’s why I’m forever grateful to have mates like Super Steve and JCB Steve to ask for advice on stuff that men are supposed to know.

Like why the fuck isn’t this chainsaw cutting through the tree. I mean I know I’m soft as shit but surely the limited pressure I’m applying to this piece of machinery should be doing more than it is. There wasn’t anything that looked immediately wrong and besides it had been sold like this – it wasn’t as if Mr Numpty here had actually tried to assemble it. Dad saw right away that the teeth of the chain were back to front, so he switched it around and hey presto I got the job done. And all without slicing through any limbs – Dad’s or mine.

I’ve always felt that Dad was disappointed in me for not being more like him, but at least today I simply did everything he asked of me in the way that he wanted. It’s a little too late in the day for exploring our relationship further tonight, but just writing those last few sentences has provided me with food for thought for a future blog or two.  

For now, it’s just the usual reminder from me to say keep the donations coming if you can. I would be enormously grateful if you could share my post from your Facebook or Twitter accounts or simply email friends, colleagues about what I’m doing. I might be slightly biased but I believe 148 consecutive blogs and a passion for making good of a terrible tragedy deserve that.


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