And so the work begins – In the name of Thiago – Day 135

The weekend just gone was a line drawn in the sand. A line that separates where I was at my most out of shape i.e. Saturday at 9am from the journey I’m now heading on. The work has started and it showed me two things. Christ, I’m fecking miles away from where I would probably like to be but two, that I can definitely get to be where I want to be.

Mentally, and on the first day of mental health awareness week, I feel as if I am in a good place. Physically, I’m pretty shagged but because the mental side is good, I reckon the physical side can come back.

I’m going to play tennis tomorrow evening and Thursday afternoon but before then I’d better do a bit of yoga as my back is giving me a fair bit of grief. On Saturday I’m going to do another long walk before my Dad returns to Stoke to move into his house. Now I’d like to play tennis with the same swagger as jazz musician Dizzy Gillespie, (pictured above).

I’m not sure about the dress code at the club where I play but I’m fairly sure that smoking and wearing only your undercrackers below the waist would probably not go down too well. There’s a wonderful joy to be had by seeing someone do something and for it not to be possible for them to give less of a shit. And in this lockdown world we live in, it seems somehow appropriate to see someone doing an activity in their pants. Now pass me my cigar…

On a far more serious and important note, Angelica has been busy today getting the felt hearts back up and running. We reckon we’ll have 100 for people to buy before long and there’s already plenty now that are made up and ready to go in the three main colours, yellow, red and blue. Please do think whether you would like to make a minimum donation of £3 to have one of these for yourself. I’m happy to post them out if you’d like me to. They are beautiful as I know many people reading this will already testify.

Angelica came home with the eighth dwarf, the NHS dwarf. I’m not sure who made this little fella but it was a lovely gift for Angelica to have, although I must confess that my first thought was, wouldn’t it be nice to have a little baby boy to give that too. Wouldn’t it just..

I’ve had a couple of moments like that recently. The other day, one of Angelica’s friends on Facebook posted a picture of her little boy, who is exactly the same age as Thiago would have been now. Her son is a handsome little fella with piercing blue eyes. Friends of hers were making comments like: ‘those eyes’. People said exactly the same about Thiago. He was incredibly handsome and absolutely full of the joys that a long life in front of him would have brought. I still can’t accept that he had to be taken from me so soon.

Angelica knows children that have been ill like Thiago and they are still with us now, which is wonderful for those children and their parents. Those parents will still have their worries, of course they will. I certainly always felt on the edge to some degree but they still have something to hold on to and all I have is my memories and the pain that will tear me up for the rest of my life. That really is fucking shit I’m afraid.  

Anyway to bring everyone back up from that moment of painful grieving, allow me to ask you kindly to consider making a donation to my noble cause, even if it is just the £3 I am asking for to have one of the beautiful Thiago hearts. We all know what the Asda campaign said and they weren’t wrong, so let’s get donating folks!